Wednesday, August 31, 2011

what we need is a little more crazy

I barely have time to drink a cup of coffee in the morning, what with the lessons in sharing and such we get to start with from the moment my boys come downstairs in the morning. I run from here to there, addressing this need or that for 99% of the day. So it is a little confusing for me that I have started casting an envious eye towards my pregnant little sister.

I conceded the end of Baby Days while still pregnant with Baby Boy. Puking my way through another pregnancy while taking care of a kiddo was hard, trying to do that while taking care of two kiddos seemed insurmountable. Still from time to time I felt a strong desire for a #3. Then my Hubby did something really amazing. He stopped resisting, told me he could go either way and it was my decision to remake. Within 10 minutes of it being a real possibility I was once again cool with stopping where we were at.

Baby Boy's transition into stages has stopped being sad for me, and instead is an indication of exciting days in our future. Days without diapers and baby gates. Days where the kids are big enough for trips to Disneyland, or to be left with grandparents while Hubby and I take a kidless vacation, something we have never ever done together.

So why...why why why why why...do I feel the yearning for another little bundle of joy? I like sleeping at night and not being anyone's milk cow.

And seriously...am I going to go on this emotional roller coaster every time someone close to me has a baby?

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