What a difference a week makes. I can talk about Little Guy and autism with crying. I can, in fact, go an entire day without crying about it. I have talked to a lot of people about it now, and it is still raw and difficult to do, but doing it helps. Two Sundays ago we had a bad day. Little Guy's class had a church performance that ended for us when we left halfway through, both of us bawling. Blogging aside, I tend to be a private person. I don't like talking about emotional stuff, and I really don't like having emotional meltdowns in public. But the blessing of it was that it brought my situation to light, and I was met with love and support from many people. Much of it I politely brushed off, still embarrassed at my tearfulness. Days later, though, the warmth of it stayed with me. The words stayed with me and some of them began to soak in.
I am doing much better, and I know that we will all be ok.